[albert_dao]

Oooooookay, listen, here's how you do it:

*Disclaimer 1, I do this all the time. But I know what to monitor and have a ton of water premixed in case anything goes south. Proceed at your own risk and don't be a scrub and keep on adding livestock if you are experiencing negative water quality.

Disclaimer 2, if you are a noob, stop reading now and just keep doing what everyone else is telling you to.

1. Set up tank. Make sure you have good equipment and lots of flow (the flow part is important). If you have any real liverock, it would be to your benefit to use it. If you don't, well, you don't.

2. You'll need a substrate for the bacteria. I use a 1:5 mix of Zeovit and Hydroton. Place this into a suitable container (media reactor, canister filter, whatever), you'll need at least 1 liter of this media per 100 gallons of water.

3. Seed the tank with a product like Zeobak or MB7 (I use Zeobak, your mileage may vary with other products) at triple the recommended dosage.

4. Add enough household ammonia (or pee, yes, pee, haw haw haw) until you get an ammonia reading of 0.25-0.50, NO MORE. If you overdose, you will retard and delay this process.

5. Add a DOC source. I use vinegar mixed with vodka and acetic acid (1:1:1 ratio by volume) at the rate of 1mL/gallon. This should cause a bacterial bloom which will cloud the water nearly opaque. Keep your skimmer running and empty the cup as necessary.

6. Continue adding bacteria (normal rate) and DOC (1mL/50 gallons) daily until the bacterial bloom subsides. This can take anywhere from three days to 15 days. Test your ammonia, nitrite and nitrate levels daily, twice a day if you're bored.

7. Enjoy your cycled tank. Continue adding bacteria until you run out. Dose DOC source as needed (test your NO3 and PO4 levels to determine the dosing rate).

This method works for me 100% of the time and I can put my money where my mouth is (read: conspic angel and gem tang +++).

Edit #1: I r bad english.

Edit #2: I know this isn't a one-day recipe, but I doubt there is one, short of being plumbed directly into a GIANT water source which can naturally buffer all of the bad stuff (e.g. the ocean).

Edit #3: Clarified the term 'bacterial bloom'.