Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquattro
Sorry, to me that's ridiculous. If he starts arguing, you lower your tone. Introduce some uncomfortable silence. Escalating the situation with him is just going to go from bad to worse. Then you smash something?? Seriously? The example we're trying to set as parents is yell louder than kid and smash stuff? Wow.
Now I can see where you think this might work, perhaps a TV show portrayed it as a good strategy. I tried this once 10 years ago. My child then punched me in the face, ran away from home and became addicted to meth. I'm going to suggest that the strategy was not overly successful. You will not yell a teenager into submission.
This kid needs direction. Work with him to decide, together, the best approach to eliminate the behaviour. See what he thinks might work, once he's honestly agreeing it's poor behaviour. If he likes to fight, maybe organized fighting. Put him in some fight training, with the rule that fighting happens at class or in the ring. Outside the ring has consequences. Help him build goals that he sees as important, so that achieving the goal outweighs the choices to behave poorly. Sit down and talk to him as a person, and find out what drives this from his point of view. So many better options than yelling him into submission.
My random thought for the day..
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To each his own, the tail doesn't wag the dog in my house. I set the rules, i enforce the rules and at the end any disiplinary actions a hug and a honest I love you always follows. Understand that with a healthy respect for authority yelling into submission works. The fact that the boy seems to have that is why I suggested it. But your right this technique can't start in the teen years where that respect doesn't exist.