I would make sure your carbon reactor is working properly. There is likely chemical warfare going on and your best chance of stopping it is a lot of carbon. Still, in a 45 gallon system, it may just be to small for 2 different types of anemones. Consider that the haddoni will be big enough to fill almost the entire system when it is done growing.
Beautiful haddoni BTW! I'd be concerned about losing your other fish.
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