Legal Help...PLEASE!!! [Archive] - Canreef Aquatics Bulletin Board

KennyKen

07-14-2009, 05:03 AM

So my girlfriend decided to kick me out of the house and break up with me at 2am on friday night.....i've dealt with it and moved on....

Now she is withholding my property and most importantly my 4 month old bulldog puppy.
I paid every penny of that $1800 and she did not put in a single cent.....
And here is the kicker, today she went behind my back and got the puppy registered in her name, techincally making her the owner.....

WTF do i do!!!

I know i can call the cops and they will escort me to the house to get my property, but with the dog they will take one look at the licence, printed today, and say its not mine

Aquattro

07-14-2009, 05:21 AM

TheMikey

07-14-2009, 05:26 AM

If you paid $1800 for a puppy, I sure hope you got a reciept or at least some kind of record of purchase (credit/debit card slip). You might have a good chance to prove that you purchased the puppy b/c this bill would be dated BEFORE she registered it.

However, my suggestion is to call a lawyer tomorrow and explore what you can do. That's your best move for something like this. If worse comes to worse, you can take her to small claims court to get your stuff back. If you win you might also be able to make her pay your legal fees.

Best of Luck!

EDIT: I guess Brad beat me to it. :)

KennyKen

07-14-2009, 05:34 AM

Oh yah there is a receipt, i mean i paid cash and the breeder knows I paid for it myself....

Im gonna try once more to reason with her, if that is possible, and if not explore the lawyer aspect.

Aquattro

07-14-2009, 05:50 AM

Im gonna try once more to reason with her, if that is possible, and if not explore the lawyer aspect.

Reasoning with a woman that just kicked you out might not be the first thing to try...:)

Go to the breeder, get a letter confirming you bought and paid for the pup, provide it as proof to the police when you go get your stuff with them.
You will likely need to go to court to get the registration changed over, unless she signs the papers over to you, which sounds not likely.

Zoaelite

07-14-2009, 05:56 AM

If you paid the $1800.00 for the dog its yours, like Brad said go to the breeder and get a conformation letter that you purchased it. Sucks that it would have to go to court (If you have to) but if that's how shes going to play then its going to suck even more for her when the judge awards the dog to you. Good luck Kenny, hope you get your puppy back!
Levi

MikeP

07-14-2009, 06:21 AM

Sorry to hear about all this. I'm also sorry to say that if you two were common law (which it sounds like you were) the dog is half hers even if you paid the whole bill. I'm 99% sure about this. Everything the two of you own should really be divided up. I'm sure you both can reach an agreement about who should get what. Seek some legal advice for sure though.

Good luck.

ElGuappo

07-14-2009, 10:31 AM

+1

Have you filed taxes together???

Sorry to hear about all this. I'm also sorry to say that if you two were common law (which it sounds like you were) the dog is half hers even if you paid the whole bill. I'm 99% sure about this. Everything the two of you own should really be divided up. I'm sure you both can reach an agreement about who should get what. Seek some legal advice for sure though.

Good luck.

Leah

07-14-2009, 11:39 AM

That really sucks hope she calms down and gives the puppy back sounds like she is
pretty sour about something. Did she like the puppy that much? Or is it out of spite?

mark

07-14-2009, 12:34 PM

If you were together long enough to be common-law might be more than just half the puppy (car, her credit card and other debts, pensions, CPP, etc).

michika

07-14-2009, 12:52 PM

Start with Brad's recommendation about getting the letter from the breeder. Then I'd advise you take it to one of the better stations around the city, and go from there.

After that your next move should be to change the access to any accounts you've given her priviledges to that are soley yours. Also forward your mail ASAP as one of the common factors with petty women is that they like to mess around with your mail, withholding bills, etc. Don't forget to swap your vehicle insurance into your own name either.

levi1803

07-14-2009, 12:54 PM

sphelps

07-14-2009, 02:29 PM

I would let things settle a little, don't panic just yet. I've had a few friends go through similar things and usually the girl calms down after a few days and becomes more reasonable. I can guarantee you that threatening and involving lawyers will tick her off and make things much worse. In the end she's probably got just as much right to ownership as you do, even if you paid she could say it was a gift which will match the registration.

Relax and let her calm down, she'll come to her senses and eventually do the right thing, I would bet on it. I'm sure she was once a nice person, she will be again, girls just get crazy sometimes, eventually you'll get use to this :lol:

BlueAbyss

07-14-2009, 04:55 PM

^+1... Jumping the gun will just make things worse.

I have to agree with what others have said about being common law... if you are common law then you're pretty much hooped. If not, there is much you can do... starting with a receipt for 1800.00 paid for the dog (which you should have received, with CKC papers if the dog is purebred).

Just a note also, if you didn't get CKC papers from the breeder, or the breeder asks you to pay for the CKC registration, this is wrong... the breeder can NOT charge you for the papers if they are claiming that the dog is purebred and they are a registered member of the CKC. They must present the papers to you when you pay for the animal.

Leah

07-14-2009, 04:56 PM

Girls just get crazy sometimes ouch!

sphelps

07-14-2009, 05:02 PM

Girls just get crazy sometimes ouch!
Yeah sorry, if it makes you feel any better guys are real dumbasses sometimes to :wink:

Seriously though, wasn't trying to offend anyone, if I did, let me know and I'll remove it.

Leah

07-14-2009, 05:06 PM

No to be perfectly honest you have a point.....but have to agree I would not add fuel
to the fire at this point some woman can be vindictive not myself of course, others hehe!

fishoholic

07-14-2009, 06:07 PM

No to be perfectly honest you have a point.....but have to agree I would not add fuel
to the fire at this point some woman can be vindictive not myself of course, others hehe!

+1 :biggrin:

KennyKen

07-14-2009, 08:10 PM

If you were together long enough to be common-law might be more than just half the puppy (car, her credit card and other debts, pensions, CPP, etc).

Im not that old, and havent really started my life yet so there isnt much in the way of assets available to her, we dont share any accounts, credits cards or have we filed taxes together..

But we have lived together for more than 2years so does that make us common law?

I've backed off, stopped calling her to wait for her next move. If she does not cooperate by the end of the week i will go with the more legal route or atleast the police....
I need my dog, and im running out of clean underwear.

KennyKen

07-14-2009, 08:13 PM

Did your girlfriend register the dog for a dog licence? or the actual registration for the CKC or something? Does the dog have a microchip that is listed in your name, and is there any vet records that have only your name on the dog or are they in both your names? Also, did the breeder give you a health warranty that was filled out with your name on it?

The dog has not been tattooed or chipped while i was in the picture, im not sure if when she registered him with the city for a licence, do they tattoo him there??

All vet statements i paid for with cash, so no real paper trail there.

And as for all the paperwork from the breeder to us, well im pretty sure she is hiding that quite well, if its even around anymore. But it probably has both our names on it, silly mistake. lol

The Codfather

07-14-2009, 08:16 PM

Common law starts after 6 months of living together.

sphelps

07-14-2009, 08:23 PM

The best thing you can do it nothing. One thing I've know is that women always win, despite who is paying the bills women always seem to have more rights in these kinds of matters. If you go legal you will loose your dog, your only hope is that she turns around and does the right thing on her own but try and make her and you'll loose.

banditpowdercoat

07-14-2009, 09:04 PM

If it only cost you $1800 to get rid of the woman, consider yourself lucky. It's painfully unjust how the guy allways gets raked over the coals in a split up. Even is SHE was the one who cheated/at fault. Women know this, and some take every advantage of it. I have a bud who just plit from his wife. They agree'd on a settlement and he paid her out. Now she's goin back on it and wants half the house too, which, BTW, she never put a penny into..... Just makes me sic.....

mike31154

07-14-2009, 09:08 PM

Don't worry about the dog, worry about the clean underwear and be happy there are no human babies involved. You say you've moved on from the kicking out part, you'll probably need to move on with regard to the pup as well, unfortunate, but reality. I also think it would be best if we refrain from letting this turn into a guy vs the girl fiasco. It's never pleasant, but there are always two sides to the coin and nowadays, everyone should be well aware of what a relationship entails and the consequences of the ending of that relationship. How do I know this? Personal experience, perhaps...

Leah

07-14-2009, 09:52 PM

Sometimes it helps just to vent and I am positive we have all been there at one time or another and it may help to hear an unbiased opinion even from guy's and gals. Don't
think anyone would/could take offense as we are not envolved. He will do what he thinks
is best.

Ken

07-15-2009, 12:04 AM

Be glad it's only $1800, I'd be worried about getting new underwear asap before a lawyer, best let things cool off, and what did you do to tick her off? Regards Ken

michika

07-15-2009, 01:40 AM

The dog has not been tattooed or chipped while i was in the picture, im not sure if when she registered him with the city for a licence, do they tattoo him there??

All vet statements i paid for with cash, so no real paper trail there.

And as for all the paperwork from the breeder to us, well im pretty sure she is hiding that quite well, if its even around anymore. But it probably has both our names on it, silly mistake. lol

Your dog would be chipped or tattooed, or both, at the vet, not by the city. I'd call your vet and ask for receipts. They'll have a record of your puppies visits regardless of your method of payment.

365seasons

07-15-2009, 01:58 AM

So sorry to hear about your puppy!
Hopefully you can get him back.

Give her a bit to cool off, and apologize (even if she's at fault), but tell her that you want to work things out in a sensible way, to make things the easiest for the both of you.

Common law applies after 6 month of living together, but sometimes isn't official until taxes are filed together.

We're a younger couple too, and that can make things easier or more difficult, so just try and take things slow, stay calm in the process, and hope for the best.

=) Best of luck.

KennyKen

07-15-2009, 02:14 AM

iansfishy

07-15-2009, 02:23 AM

I gotta agree with Bandit, $1800.00 is a great price to pay for freedom! oh sweet freedom....... Dont worry if the dog is still young and chewing stuff and generally making a mess of things like bulldogs do, she'll be begging you to take it back when things cool off. Meanwhile, your in Calgary and just got out of a two year relationship. If you really want help Id advise you to call a bud and get to one of the establishments downtown... Ranchmens and Coyotes always did the trick for me! Sphelps is right though, guys can be weird but women are CRAZY until like 27 or 28 years old. Come on ladies, you know im right!

michika

07-15-2009, 02:25 AM

Yay! I'm so happy to read this. First things first, tomorrow you get the registration changed over at the city of Calgary. Do the same thing with your vet, and if you have pet insurance.

Photos of your puppy when you get it home?

StirCrazy

07-15-2009, 03:36 AM

sooo what about THE FISH TANK??????? :mrgreen:

seriously though, even if you want to give her some more time that is not always the best thing to do. I would at least talk to the police and explain the situation to them.. I had to have a police escort to recover some of my stuff when a simular situation happened.. I waited on the sidewalk, the police made sure there was going to be no trouble and took her aside and the other officer followed me to get my stuff.

ask the police about the dog.. ask them what they would concider proof that it is your dog and then go get the proof.. and you won't have a problem getting your stuff back.. this isn't a lawyer thing just a civel dispute ... cop stuff.

anyways I didn't read the last couple posts so sounds like it is working for ya.

Steve

KennyKen

07-15-2009, 04:21 AM

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3410/3637293837_d9eb255109.jpg?v=0

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3624/3637293727_448eee26e6.jpg?v=0

Fish tank is waiting to be set up. I recently purchased a 90g set-up from "blom" on here. The hunt for a new place begins tomorrow, then the process of starting the new tank and life ensues

golf nut

07-15-2009, 04:49 AM

...
as for the underwear...that remains to be seen......

Spare me ...

Aquattro

07-15-2009, 04:56 AM

Where does this "common law is 6 months" come from? According to this site, division of property in Alberta does not qualify until 3 yrs.

http://www.common-law-separation-canada.com/alberta.htm

fishoholic

07-15-2009, 04:56 AM

So good news,
after an hour on the phone ive made her realize that i would give the dog a better life, and that is what is most important.

Im picking him up around 11 tonight.....
as for the underwear...that remains to be seen......

Thanks guys, its been great to read your replies.

Buy yourself new undies or wash the ones you've got :wink: At least underwear is replaceable, since animals are not I'm glad to hear that you're getting your dog back :biggrin: Let us know how it goes (or went) when you go to pick up the dog. I think with animals they should go to whoever is going to take good care of them. If you're the one who has been looking after/taking care of the dog then of course the dog belongs with you.

Love the pic.'s he's a cute puppy.

StirCrazy

07-15-2009, 05:04 AM

Where does this "common law is 6 months" come from? According to this site, division of property in Alberta does not qualify until 3 yrs.

http://www.common-law-separation-canada.com/alberta.htm

the only thing for the 6 months is the minimum you can live togeather for befor delairing common law status.. only way faster is to have a kid. but this doesn't mean you are common law only that you are eligible to claim it.. and 6 months is federal.. in BC it is 1 year.

still up for coffee tomorrow night?

Steve

fishoholic

07-15-2009, 05:11 AM

Where does this "common law is 6 months" come from? According to this site, division of property in Alberta does not qualify until 3 yrs.

http://www.common-law-separation-canada.com/alberta.htm

:surprise: I've had many many people tell me 6 months so I always thought it was 6 months, for some reason I think my lawyer even told me it was 6 months but maybe I'm remembering wrong. Anyway when I googled common-law in alberta everything came up saying 3 years :noidea:

fishoholic

07-15-2009, 05:15 AM

the only thing for the 6 months is the minimum you can live togeather for befor delairing common law status.. only way faster is to have a kid. but this doesn't mean you are common law only that you are eligible to claim it.. and 6 months is federal.. in BC it is 1 year.

Steve

:idea: Oh, that makes sense.

Aquattro

07-15-2009, 05:23 AM

in BC it is 1 year.

still up for coffee tomorrow night?

Steve

BC is 2 years, as per the definition of spouse from the Family Relations Act..
Coffee, maybe after flyball practice....call me

"
"spouse" means a person who
(a) is married to another person,
(b) except under Parts 5 and 6, lived with another person in a marriage-like relationship for a period of at least 2 years if the application under this Act is made within one year after they ceased to live together and, for the purposes of this Act, the marriage-like relationship may be between persons of the same gender,
"

StirCrazy

07-15-2009, 12:26 PM

BC is 2 years, as per the definition of spouse from the Family Relations Act..
Coffee, maybe after flyball practice....call me

"
"spouse" means a person who
(a) is married to another person,
(b) except under Parts 5 and 6, lived with another person in a marriage-like relationship for a period of at least 2 years if the application under this Act is made within one year after they ceased to live together and, for the purposes of this Act, the marriage-like relationship may be between persons of the same gender,
"

actualy that is for the purpose of suport I believe and/or when it is infered that you are common law, and you don't have to claim common law after two years.. you can apply for comon law status at 1 year I believe in BC and after 6 months if you are in the military as the military uses the federal definitions.

Steve

michika

07-15-2009, 01:07 PM

Your puppy is adorable! Thank you for the photos.

Any luck with getting your other property?

sphelps

07-15-2009, 01:55 PM

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3624/3637293727_448eee26e6.jpg?v=0

Adorable, no wounder she wanted to keep him! Look at those paws, he's going to be big. Congrats!

KennyKen

07-15-2009, 08:32 PM

Your puppy is adorable! Thank you for the photos.

Any luck with getting your other property?

No property yet.......
Im going to give her till the weekend to cool off.

karazy

07-15-2009, 08:33 PM

No property yet.......
Im going to give her till the weekend to cool off.

or you could do it the good old fashion way. B&E!:lol:

Zoaelite

07-15-2009, 10:41 PM

B&E?:neutral:

parkinsn

07-15-2009, 11:42 PM

Break and enter, last time i checked frowned upon by the legal system....:lol:

karazy

07-16-2009, 03:55 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BiIa_w5CmMo

B&E!

EmilyB

07-16-2009, 04:19 AM

It is so sad that those dogs cannot breed or deliver without human intervention. I hope you give this dog the happiest home ever and have it neutered.

Best wishes.

sphelps

07-16-2009, 04:25 AM

If it helps it's not illegal to steal property that belows to you.

karazy

07-16-2009, 04:32 AM

If it helps it's not illegal to steal property that belows to you.

see, sphelps has the idea!

Aquattro

07-16-2009, 04:35 AM

If it helps it's not illegal to steal property that belows to you.

trespassing to get it is :)

sphelps

07-16-2009, 05:11 AM

trespassing to get it is :)
It's not trespassing if you live there, why else would you have a key:wink: I'd like to see someone get in trouble for that.

Aquattro

07-16-2009, 01:23 PM

It's not trespassing if you live there, why else would you have a key:wink: I'd like to see someone get in trouble for that.

I'd like to see that work for ya when the woman calls the cops. 5 bucks says you get a flashlight up side the head and a ride somewhere, without stuff.

sphelps

07-16-2009, 02:25 PM

I'd like to see that work for ya when the woman calls the cops. 5 bucks says you get a flashlight up side the head and a ride somewhere, without stuff.
Obviously you would wait until she's at work, I'm assuming she has to work if she lives by herself. By the time she knew you were there you would be long gone and can guarantee that no crime was technically committed. I'm betting you also split the rent and technically you're still paying rent for at least this month. You're simply taking what's yours which is not illegal, cops would even escort you in there personally if you asked, I just think it would be easier to go on the down low when she's not around so the cops don't have to be involved and you don't waist my tax money :mrgreen:

banditpowdercoat

07-16-2009, 03:06 PM

My Bud's estranged Ex came in and cleaned him out one day when we were off snowmobiling. We came back, she took the kitchen table, couch, Plasma TV, bed etc. All which HE bought, cause she never worked. Nothin he could do. Poor guy...

So ya, go back and take whats yours, Just yours tho. I belive in true equality.

workn2hard2day

07-16-2009, 04:06 PM

wow, I hope you can get your pup back. also hope she isn't reading this thread.....

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 04:35 PM

If a woman gets the best of a guy, he usually takes the hit, and moves on. If a man gets the best of a woman, she will typically be out for vengeance and cry victim and do whatever it takes to get even... sorry ladies but it is true and this is a woman speaking by the way.

The poster must have really done something SUPER bad to make a woman keep his stuff and throw his butt out. I think he should wait and let her cool down like he had mentioned. She might not be able to give him his clothes and underwear back since she might have cut them into pieces. I have known woman that have done things of this nature.

I am very lucky to have had a very awesome relationship with my husband of 16 years, but have seen what can happen when a woman is really ****ed at her man. Good luck to the poster, he may need it... he should just lay low for awhile.

KennyKen

07-16-2009, 06:11 PM

The poster must have really done something SUPER bad to make a woman keep his stuff and throw his butt out.

Do you want to know what i did?
I am the younger person in the relationship and am in quote "party mode", and have no real aspirations in life.
So she wanted me to change, this was at the beginning of stampede, when 2 of my best friends had arrived into town from Toronto and i had stumbled home at 5 am.....
So 5 days later i was still in "party mode" as it was the final weekend of the pede when i cam home around 2 am friday to a bag packed and a note saying "Here is bag, leave"

And believe me im not leaving anything out of "bad" stuff i have done....
She has been a real bull on this.

StirCrazy

07-16-2009, 07:10 PM

well if you paid rent for this month and have a key techinicly you live there still and could go back and get your stuff. if anyone asks, just say you saw the note, went to a friends for a few days, realized it was time to seperate and went back to get your stuff and leave the key there and lock the door behind you.

Steve

mark

07-16-2009, 07:13 PM

any thoughts of getting back together once things cool down? Might guide how you approach things.

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 07:59 PM

:lol::lol::lol: I didn't mean anything bad by what I said... I can say if my husband did this for as long as you did, I prob would have felt inclined to do the same thing. If you are living with this woman, and in a relationship, you can't have "party mode" and her at the same time, unless she is invited to party with you:wink:

If I were you, I would be butt kissing, sending flowers and apologizing a whole lot. I am not condoning her keeping your belongings, since that is just as immature as you have been during the Stampede. I don't know how much older she is then you, but if you are living with her and stuff, it is a more serious relationship. I guess you have to decide if you really want to settle down into a relationship or be in party mode. How old are you anyways, if you don't mind me asking?

If you have a dog, you still do need a lot of responsibility in keeping him happy and you do have to give him stability and guidance. You can't be out all night partying when your dog is at home alone. Your dog only has YOU and YOU are his only source of company and friendship. I guess this is why your ex decided she should keep him, since it was her that was stuck with the responsibility while you were partying. I have had dogs since I was 19 years old, and although I went through party mode with hubby (was with him since I was 21 and he was 19), the dogs were always first and foremost in priorities.

I'm not trying to bust your chops (I am sure they have been busted up enough:wink:), but doing a week long party thing without her, is really rotten. You really did ask for it in the end. She should give you your stuff back, and you are right, once she cools down, approach her for it again.

You cannot expect her to have to live with this inconsiderate behavior, no matter how old you are. You were sleeping in her bed, and playing house, which means she has the right to have expectations from you. Sorry if I am being blunt but I can't sugar coat it for you. Good luck with whatever happens and I do think you are entitled to your stuff. Just leave a note and say how sorry you are things didn't work out between you, and she deserves better then what she got from you. Take full responsibility for your actions and lay the blame on yourself. She might come around sooner if you don't give any excuses.

Do you want to know what i did?
I am the younger person in the relationship and am in quote "party mode", and have no real aspirations in life.
So she wanted me to change, this was at the beginning of stampede, when 2 of my best friends had arrived into town from Toronto and i had stumbled home at 5 am.....
So 5 days later i was still in "party mode" as it was the final weekend of the pede when i cam home around 2 am friday to a bag packed and a note saying "Here is bag, leave"

And believe me im not leaving anything out of "bad" stuff i have done....
She has been a real bull on this.

sphelps

07-16-2009, 08:11 PM

Sorry but I know my gf wouldn't mind if I went partying for a few days because old friends came into town. She might not be too thrilled inside but wouldn't stop me from going or kick me out as a result, provided I didn't do anything really bad :wink:. You can't base a relationship on hoping or trying to change the other person, that's not how it works so IMO she was in the wrong and you don't owe her anything. By the sounds of things she sounds fairly manipulative, immature and only happy if she gets her way. She obviously wasn't ready for a real relationship and perhaps you weren't either so lets all move on :biggrin:

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 08:20 PM

True enough, but each any every person is different. I don't know the whole take on the relationship BUT I gave him the worst case scenario. I know well enough that you have no right to try to change someone else. I have been with my husband long enough to know it is easier to change yourself to accept certain things in your mate, rather then fight them to be what you want. However, there is also meeting in the middle, and a whole entire week of partying all hours of the night and coming home drunk, is not meeting in the middle either. There has to be some consideration towards someone else's feelings in the end. I am not condoning what she did, but I am also not going to take the poster's side since I feel he really has no regard for her feelings at all. Using the excuse that he has no aspirations in life, shows he is not taking any responsibility. I bet he did not call her to say he would be out all night or tell her anything at all.

Sorry but I know my gf wouldn't mind if I went partying for a few days because old friends came into town. She might not be too thrilled inside but wouldn't stop me from going or kick me out as a result, provided I didn't do anything really bad :wink:. You can't base a relationship on hoping or trying to change the other person, that's not how it works so IMO she was in the wrong and you don't owe her anything. By the sounds of things she sounds fairly manipulative, immature and only happy if she gets her way. She obviously wasn't ready for a real relationship and perhaps you weren't either so lets all move on :biggrin:

sphelps

07-16-2009, 08:29 PM

What are you talking about? He came home at 2am the one night :lol:

All kidding aside good relationships are all about compromise but a young guy should have every right to party with his friends during the stampede, the compromise could have been something he would do after the stampede and his friends are back out of town. It seems blatantly obvious she didn't give, just took saying my way or the highway.

michika

07-16-2009, 08:33 PM

Do you want to know what i did?
I am the younger person in the relationship and am in quote "party mode", and have no real aspirations in life.
So she wanted me to change, this was at the beginning of stampede, when 2 of my best friends had arrived into town from Toronto and i had stumbled home at 5 am.....
So 5 days later i was still in "party mode" as it was the final weekend of the pede when i cam home around 2 am friday to a bag packed and a note saying "Here is bag, leave"

And believe me im not leaving anything out of "bad" stuff i have done....
She has been a real bull on this.

Thats it? Seriously? Yeah, like others have mentioned, cut and run! Take your puppy and run far far far away! If she reacted like this over friends in town for the Stampede, what else will she react over, and how far would it go in the future? I party all the time, frequently until dawn the following day. Its never been an issue. Then again relationships are unique. Although I still stand by my recommendation, based on the provided information, that you just chalk it up to a bad experience and move on.

Just go straight to the cops for an escort to your own property to get your stuff. Do it during the day like mentioned to avoid the interactions that might come in the evening.

Any luck on a new place?

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 08:38 PM

Well my best advise on his behalf to his ex girlfriend is if you can't beat him, join him :lol:

I hate the bar Cowboys very much, but I have gone the odd time to party with the hubby back in the day. He would invite me often for club nights and I would opt out sometimes, but the invite was there, so I couldn't get mad. I know he knew I would say no anyways and he had FREEDOM:wink:

What did **** me off is when he would roll in at 5am... without calling. He had a reputation for fighting and I would always wonder if he was in jail or emergency. I also did not like the fact that he may drink and drive or his buddies would do the same and get in an accident. Sometimes a group of guys does not have the best judgment in party mode.

In a relationship there is a certain warfare that comes along with meeting in the middle, but it is different with every person and relationship. Sometimes you need to know how to trick your significant other into thinking certain things were their idea in the first place:wink: That comes with time, age and experience, which the poster admits by his part mode comment he does not have just yet.

Man, I could tell you so many stories...

What are you talking about? He came home at 2am the one night :lol:

All kidding aside good relationships are all about compromise but a young guy should have every right to party with his friends during the stampede, the compromise could have been something he would do after the stampede and his friends are back out of town. It seems blatantly obvious she didn't give, just took saying my way or the highway.

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 08:42 PM

Just like you said, relationships are unique. I don't know how much older the ex girlfriend is in this case, and she may have bitten off more then she could chew. I agree he should get out of the relationship, since it is clearly not what both people are looking for out of it. Sometimes we learn about the significant other through the mistakes we make...

So long as he cares for his dog properly while he is out partying, then I don't think it is such a bad thing. Like I mentioned before, the dog has nobody else but him for attention.

Thats it? Seriously? Yeah, like others have mentioned, cut and run! Take your puppy and run far far far away! If she reacted like this over friends in town for the Stampede, what else will she react over, and how far would it go in the future? I party all the time, frequently until dawn the following day. Its never been an issue. Then again relationships are unique. Although I still stand by my recommendation, based on the provided information, that you just chalk it up to a bad experience and move on.

Just go straight to the cops for an escort to your own property to get your stuff. Do it during the day like mentioned to avoid the interactions that might come in the evening.

Any luck on a new place?

KennyKen

07-16-2009, 09:12 PM

Well here is the deal now. Im borrowing a truck and getting all my stuff out tomorrow evening....granted she lets me in.:lol:
I am 24 and she is 27, and the invite to go out with me is ALWAYS there, she is just really introverted opposed to myself, being extremely extroverted.

As for reconciliation, that appears to be out of the question. If can she just flip a switch like a reset button and complely forget about our history together, its not worth trying to start over again.

The next step is uncertain. Im staying at friends right now that has 2 dogs (one of them being a bulldog) and there is always someone home, when i am not. But as for a long term stay, this is not. SO for the time being this is a good spot for me.

Im looking for a place with another friend, but im not gonna wait to long on that either. If i have not found a place by the middle August, im moving back to Toronto to live with my brother.

By the way, anyone have any connections with uhaul or a moving company. I enquired about renting the smallest cube truck from uhaul for the trip and the quote was $2900...but the guy liked me so much he said he would drop it too 2800$, LOL
I dont have much to move at all, 6 or 7 boxes, a tv and a 90g tank and stand (im keeping my equipment if i do move there as everything is over priced out there)

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 09:26 PM

Well at least you know early you guys are just not right for each other. Better now then after having children and all the other stuff. At least you invited her out with you. I didn't like the club scene but once you drink enough, all the inhibitions go away quickly:wink:

Don't waste you time trying live up to expectations you know you are not ready to live up to right now. At least the pup is taken care of and he was my biggest concern. We as people can care for our needs, but dogs are stuck with what we provide them. Good for you for looking out for him.

I don't know if it would be cheaper to put your stuff on a Greyhound bus or something, since you don't really have all that much. I would also put an add on Calgary Kijiji seeing if anyone is driving out to your destination and if they have space for you and your stuff perhaps for a part of the travel expense. It is worth a try. Sometimes people are needing a person to drive or deliver a vehicle to other provinces so look out for that as well. Uhaul sure tried to bend you over, and after the week you had, you need a break.

Do you have the pup with you now? I am glad you at least were able to get him in the negotiations. Good luck with everything and the Stampede is notorious for being a relationship ender. I think there was something in the newspaper about it:mrgreen:

Well here is the deal now. Im borrowing a truck and getting all my stuff out tomorrow evening....granted she lets me in.:lol:
I am 24 and she is 27, and the invite to go out with me is ALWAYS there, she is just really introverted opposed to myself, being extremely extroverted.

As for reconciliation, that appears to be out of the question. If can she just flip a switch like a reset button and complely forget about our history together, its not worth trying to start over again.

The next step is uncertain. Im staying at friends right now that has 2 dogs (one of them being a bulldog) and there is always someone home, when i am not. But as for a long term stay, this is not. SO for the time being this is a good spot for me.

Im looking for a place with another friend, but im not gonna wait to long on that either. If i have not found a place by the middle August, im moving back to Toronto to live with my brother.

By the way, anyone have any connections with uhaul or a moving company. I enquired about renting the smallest cube truck from uhaul for the trip and the quote was $2900...but the guy liked me so much he said he would drop it too 2800$, LOL
I dont have much to move at all, 6 or 7 boxes, a tv and a 90g tank and stand (im keeping my equipment if i do move there as everything is over priced out there)

michika

07-16-2009, 09:59 PM

If you have that few boxes, just greyhound them. I'd pack up some of my harder to find equipment, and just take that home with me. Everything else I'd sell to finance to move home. Some equipment is easy to find again, and some isn't, so things like the tank itself might be easy, while a fancy custom stand wouldn't be.

The other option is get someone who is over 25 to rent a truck, just a regular pick-up. You have to be 25 in Alberta to rent everything beyond a car. Map out a road-trip type destination including pet friendly hotels/motels/camp sites along the way and just drive out. A friend of mine did it 2 years in row when she went to University out there. I think they made the trip in 3 days including some goofing around.

Just budget out the difference in costs; flying + greyhound for your stuff, or driving; rented truck, U-haul/etc. It might give you a better idea on what will work best.

Watch the rental places for sales/promos to see if you can get an unlimited Km deal with a return at another location.

Phanman

07-16-2009, 10:21 PM

If your looking for rental property in calgary PM me. I can probably help you out. A friend of mine rents out his properties that he owns. (Think he has 3 available right now) Let me know the area ur looking for and your budget and ill give him a ring for you. :wink:

StirCrazy

07-16-2009, 11:33 PM

I have to agree, I would expect the same thing if I did a 5 day party with my buddies :mrgreen:

one night is totaly ok, but at my age it would take me two weeks to recover from one night with some of my buddies :redface:

but 5 nights... many I would be lucky to even be given a note and a bag of clothes.. I mean seariously about day 3 I would be wondering if I should even go home and by day 5 I wouldn't have to wonder anymore.. and I normaly go off for 3 to 6 months for work.. totaly different though, you can expect the other 1/2 to take all the responcibility while your out having fun.

Steve

my2rotties

07-16-2009, 11:55 PM

I can honestly say that even when I was first with my hubby, he would not have tolerated me going partying with friends for days in a row. Call me whipped I don't care... I went every where with him, and invited my friends to come with us, ot him come out with my friends and I. However relationships are unique like Cathrine said... My hubby and I have always been the very best of friends since the beginning and I think this is a huge part of building and keeping a successful relationship.

I have to agree, I would expect the same thing if I did a 5 day party with my buddies :mrgreen:

one night is totaly ok, but at my age it would take me two weeks to recover from one night with some of my buddies :redface:

but 5 nights... many I would be lucky to even be given a note and a bag of clothes.. I mean seariously about day 3 I would be wondering if I should even go home and by day 5 I wouldn't have to wonder anymore.. and I normaly go off for 3 to 6 months for work.. totaly different though, you can expect the other 1/2 to take all the responcibility while your out having fun.

Steve